AKITA, JAPAN – In what can only be described as a cautionary tale for ALTs across Japan, 28-year-old Tyson Steiner, an American JET Programme participant from New Jersey, has been officially declared missing five weeks after getting lost inside a FamilyMart while intoxicated.
According to reports, Tyson was last seen stumbling into the convenience store after downing multiple cans of Strong Zero
after a nomikai with international exchange students and fellow ALTs at an izakaya near Akita Station. Surveillance footage shows him entering the FamilyMart at 1:49 AM, visibly inebriated, before disappearing into the restroom.
“I thought he had gone home” said fellow ALT and drinking companion Jamie Reynolds. “We all do the midnight konbini stop, grab a rice ball, maybe an american dog, and then crash. But I guess Tyson had other plans.”
Sources say that Tyson, overwhelmed by a mix of alcohol, poor decision-making, and a near mystical level of jet lag that persisted despite having lived in Japan for over a year, ended up vomiting in the FamilyMart bathroom. After this unfortunate episode, he reportedly sat down on the store’s cold, tiled floor, waiting for the shop to “reopen” completely unaware that convenience stores in Japan operate 24/7.
For reasons unknown, Tyson remained inside FamilyMart for an entire night, then another, and then another. Employees, perhaps out of politeness or sheer indifference, assumed he was just another eccentric foreigner. “He didn’t cause trouble” said an
anonymous FamilyMart worker. “He’d occasionally buy a melon pan or a can of Georgia coffee.”
Tyson’s prolonged stay went unnoticed until Sakamoto Masaru, his SHS Kouchou Sensei, finally filed a missing persons report after a month of unexplained absences. “We assumed he was on an extended vacation” said a confused vice principal. “Or maybe just sleeping through his alarm for several weeks straight.”
It wasn’t until police reviewed security footage that they discovered Tyson had, in fact, never left the FamilyMart. Officers arrived onsite to find him sitting in the store’s small eat-in space, staring blankly at the drink fridge. When asked why he hadn’t left, Tyson allegedly responded, “I was just waiting for them to unlock the doors.”
Authorities say that while Tyson is physically unharmed, he appears to have developed an intimate knowledge of FamilyMart’s inventory, including the exact restocking schedule of onigiri flavors. “I know more about Famichiki than I ever wanted to” he confessed to reporters.
Tyson has since returned to work, where he is reportedly being hailed as a “legend” by new ALTs. Meanwhile, FamilyMart employees have expressed mild disappointment at his departure. “He was quiet, polite, and bought a lot of Pocari Sweat” said the store manager. “Honestly, we kind of miss him.”
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